Vaudevillain

As Easy As... (7)

Sleepless City held many treasures. There were the various architectural marvels sitting in the city, modern twists on classical buildings that rose high into the sky. There were all the art galleries and museums, constantly under threat by aspiring villains looking to make a name for themselves. But none of them could compare to the wonder that was Sleepless City's pride and joy, the original Heroes guild.

Anyone interested in the lore of World of Supers knew that the original heroes sprang from Sleepless City, working undercover night and day to protect the population. As time went on, more and more heroes joined with them, fighting crime left and right until the first heroes guild formed. From there it the group expanded to cover the world, helping all those in need as threats rose to meet them.

The original Heroes guild building kept its rustic charm, refusing to upgrade into the high-tech behemoths of today's guilds. As such, the structure resembled a palace more than a headquarters. A long, looping driveway led up to the front steps, a sculpture garden of historic heroes standing in triumphant poses running alongside it. Upon reaching the building, one could look up to see the various windowed rooms, each one as inviting as the last. The builders topped the entire thing off with a low-sloped roof, giving the building a quaint air.

The building's owners, a trust established by the heroes guild to preserve their history, held constant galas for the various celebrities in the city. Tonight was one such night, and anyone who was anyone was there. Men in fantastic suits walked arm in arm with women sporting elegant dresses while servants milled around them, announcing their presence and moving their cars to the lot down the road.

Dr. Zlo and his companions hovered above the building, a sneer on Dr. Zlo's face as he watched the guests enter through the front steps.

"Look at them, just as pompous as any villain."

"They all dress well, at least," Sweet Dream said as she adjusted her grip on Riptide. The two rode together on the surfer's board, Sweet Dream using the travel as an excuse to stick near her boyfriend.

"Yip!" Greeney, the transformed hero, barked.

"You're right, Greeney," The Imp said. "This is a great place for a picnic!"

The two NPCs floated next to Dr. Zlo, The Imp using their powers to mimic the villain's rocket boots. In fact, Dr. Zlo's small nuisance mimicked the villain in every way they could. They stood with their arms crossed like Dr. Zlo, their small rattle cane in hand. Greeney ran around the reality warper, hard light constructs forming at her paws as she ran around the air. Dylan would have thought it was cute if The Imp wasn't trying to mimic Dr. Zlo.

But, the villain could lament his fate later. Right now, he had plans to enact.

"A picnic that will go down in history!" Dr. Zlo cackled. He turned to his companions, "Do you have the goods?"

"Uh, I thought you had them, dude?" Riptide said.

There was a pause as everyone looked at Riptide.

"Nah, I'm kidding," Riptide said.

Grinning, the surfer pulled out a bag of Sea Dream Cookies, the villain's cheesy name for their over-the-top crime. Riptide took one out for them, mostly so he could taunt The Imp with it.

"Ooh! Cookies!" The Imp cried, swiping at the cookie.

Riptide pulled it away at the last second, carefully avoiding the light blue frosting on the top. That was where Dr. Zlo added his formula, and Riptide didn't want to accidentally eat it over the course of the crime. There were bound to be a ton of debuffs inside.

"Hold on, Zlo-Mite," Riptide said to The Imp. "These are the cookies for the guests below. Not for you to eat. You've got your own bags."

"I ate those already," The Imp whined.

"Then you should have thought things through," Dr. Zlo chided. "A true villain knows when to wait."

"Like how we're waiting now?" The Imp asked.

Dr. Zlo nodded sagely, "Precisely. We're waiting for the last of the guests to arrive. When they do, we'll announce our presence, arriving fashionably late!"

The villain spun in the air, their cane extended upward. The Imp mimicked the movement, causing the Reality Warper to giggle.

Dr. Zlo stopped his flourish, sticking his cane directly in The Imp's face. "Don't! Giggle! It's unbecoming. Villain's don't giggle."

"I dunno," Riptide said with a smile. "I remember a lot of laughter coming from you earlier."

Dr. Zlo sniffed, "That was cackling. Cackling is a perfectly acceptable villainous laugh. As is snickering, sneering, and sometimes a light titter."

"I don't mean to interrupt your oh-so-interesting discussion," Sweet Dream said. "But that's the last car pulling in."

"Excellent!" Dr. Zlo clapped his hands. "Let's get started! Everyone ready!"

"Yeah!" The Imp said. "This is going to be fun!"

Dr. Zlo agreed. Grand entrances were the best part about being a villain. All the masses huddling on the ground, looking at you in fear and terror as if you were a god about to smite them. Why, that feeling of power could give anyone delusions of grandeur.

The group of villains flew down from their place in the sky, landing next to the front steps of the heroes guild. Dr. Zlo stepped forward first, idly adjusting his tie. A group of guards moved forward to meet him, each one brandishing a power in a heroic display. Dr. Zlo bowed.

"Good evening, gentlemen! I am Dr. Zlo! Criminal mastermind! Perhaps you've heard of me?"

The guards' response was to bring their powers to bear.

Dr. Zlo pulled back, a frown on his face but a twinkle in his eye, "Tut-tut! Such terrible manners! Here I am, introducing myself, and you can't even grant me the decency to reply?"

"Villains like yourself don't do decent," A guard answered, pulling a sword out of its sheath. "We're not about to fall for any of your tricks."

"Well, good," Dr. Zlo said with a smug smile. "After all, tricks are for kids. Isn't that right, Zlo-Mite?"

The guards turned to see Dr. Zlo's miniature step forward, copying the villain's smug smile. The guards turned to the new arrival, puzzlement on their face. It soon turned back to steely resolve as they noticed The Imp activating his powers.

"Get them! Don't let them interrupt the gala!" One guard shouted.

Powers sprang to life as the guards rushed at the villains. Energy blasts lanced out, heat and ice launched, and multiple guards transformed into brilliant figures. All of it rushed toward Dr. Zlo and crew, the former leaning on his cane and yawning.

"Zlo-Mite. See to our little problem," the villain said.

Before any of the powers could hit, The Imp warped reality. The energy blasts flying toward Dr. Zlo twisted in place, forming into balloon animals. The newly formed balloons floated up to the sky before winking out of existence. The Imp then turned to the heat rays coming toward them and molded them into sunglasses with a loop of their hand. The shades landed on the steps of the old heroes guild, witnessing the rest of the fight. The Ice rays came next, getting spun into a line of snow cones that flew into the villain's hands.

While this all happened, the transformed guards attempted to tackle The Imp to the ground, trusting that their powers would protect them. The Imp laughed, turning toward them and pressing his hands down. The guards shrank with each step they took, arriving in front of the reality warper the size of dolls. The Imp scooped up two of the shrunken guards, using their power to freeze the protectors in place before pointing them at the other guards.

"Go get them, Sir Destructo and Lady Dynamite!" The Imp shouted, tossing the two grabbed guards.

The two guards changed in midair, becoming robotic and gaining red laser guns. No longer were they NPC protectors, but Sir Destructo and Lady Dynamite, The Imp's newest action figures. Red lasers blasted from their grafted guns, bowling over the other shrunken guards.

"Destroy them all!" Sir Destruco said in a robotic voice.

"Affirmative!" Lady Dynamite answered.

The two tiny robots continued their assault on the guards, wiping out anyone who stepped forward. The Imp covered them with his reality warping powers, stopping anything harmful from breaking his new toys.

It was all over in less than a minute. The other guards not affected by The Imp's powers fell to Riptide's stealthy board and the crew's new cookies. The lot of guards sat on the front steps, blissful smiles on their faces and crumbs on their cheeks.

"Dude, they devoured those cookies once they got a taste," Riptide said. "That's freaky."

"You came up with the idea," Dr. Zlo stated. "You aren't allowed to call it freaky."

"Let's get inside," Sweet Dream said. "We weren't exactly subtle."

"Of course not," Dr. Zlo said. "How else could we announce our entrance?"