Vaudevillain

As Easy As... (1)

Dr. Zlo stood inside his secret lair, messing around with item durability, when he got a call from Riptide.

"Dr. Zlo, the foremost criminal mastermind and inventor extraordinaire. What dastardly deeds do you need done?" The villain answered.

Riptide's chipper voice spoke from the other line, "Dude! Do you want to help me with this crime me and Sweet Dream are doing?"

Dr. Zlo closed the box he was working on, giving the call his full attention. It seemed Riptide had gotten a new idea into his head. The villain wondered what it would be this time, and how it would relate to surfing. Dr. Zlo still remembered when Riptide surfed that cruise ship over Skyline.

"What kind of crime."

"The fun kind!" Riptide answered.

Dr. Zlo pinched the bridge of his nose, "Are you not going to explain?"

"Not until you say yes!" Riptide answered excitedly.

"Fine. I could use the break." There was no convincing Riptide when he was like this. And honestly, Dylan didn't see a reason to stop his friend. Anything Riptide came up with was bound to be a fun time.

"Yeah!"

Dr. Zlo could almost hear Riptide pumping his fist.

"Meet us outside the teleporters in fifteen!" Riptide exclaimed. "Oh, and don't bring minions. This is an evil villains only meeting."

Dr. Zlo rolled his eyes. It was apparent that Riptide had something insane in mind this time.

"Fine. I'll humor you just this once."

"That's what you said last time, dude," Riptide joked. "Anyway. See you soon!"

The surfer hung up the call before Dr. Zlo could respond, getting the last word in. Dr. Zlo shook his fist, acting the furious villain despite the lack of others present. He had to stay in the mindset, else he'd break in front of Riptide when the surfer did something stupid. Dylan didn't want to ruin Dr. Zlo's villainous image.

Dr. Zlo walked out of his secret lair, saying goodbye to Cass and Brunhilde in the process.

"Don't let the Jacques break anything downstairs, you two. And keep an eye on Quartet!"

"Alwayz, Herr Zlo," Brunhilde answered.

The butler set down the glass he was polishing, "You going somewhere, boss?"

The villain waved a hand, "Riptide needs my expertise."

Cass stowed the towel he used for polishing, "I'll get ready."

"Not this time, Cass," Dr. Zlo answered, bringing up a hand. "Riptide wants a bit more secrecy. It sounds like he's got something big planned."

"Oh," Cass said, looking a bit despondent. "Okay."

"Don't vorry," Brunhilde said, placing a hand on Cass's shoulder. "Ve can vork together to fix up some of zhe broken machines."

"Are you sure you don't need me, boss?" Cass gave Dr. Zlo a pleading look. Dylan remembered the last time Cass and Brunhilde were left alone. Though, this wasn't anything like that time. A group of heroes wasn't trying to invade his base, for one.

"I'd rather not ruin my professional relationship with Riptide," Dr. Zlo answered. "As annoying as he can be, the man comes up with some dastardly plots."

"Okay then," Cass answered, his shoulders slumping. "Stay safe then, boss."

"Now, Cass. You know I can't promise that!" Dr. Zlo cackled. "Villainy is a dangerous profession!"

With those words, Dr. Zlo walked out the door, greeting a few players waving to him. Things were dying down again after his last stint outside Skyline, making it the perfect time to return for another crime. Of course, plenty of people in Menagerie were focusing on the mad scientist known as Dr. Zlo. Mostly fans, but Dylan saw a few ambitious eyes in the crowd. He might have to contend with some of Saul's contracts this time out. Oh well, that was part of the fun.

The teleporters were as busy as ever, the pristine building carrying players and NPCs across all of World of Supers. Sweet Dream and Riptide arrived a few minutes later, the two holding hands as Riptide surfed them inside. The two villains touched down next to Dr. Zlo, Riptide jumping off the surfboard and performing a flip.

"I hope you didn't bring me here for mere circus tricks," Dr. Zlo commented, eyebrow raised.

"No, I wouldn't have let him," Sweet Dream answered.

Riptide recoiled, "Ah! The whip!" The surfer turned to his friend, "Dude, did you see her strike at me with those cutting words?"

"Shut up," Sweet Dream said, pushing Riptide.

"Could you get to the point?" Dr. Zlo huffed. "Everyone already knows how sweet you are with each other."

Sweet Dream tilted her head in Riptide's direction, "He's got a crime planned. A good one, surprisingly."

Dr. Zlo looked at Riptide, suspicious, "Does he now?"

"Heck yeah, dude!" Riptide beamed. The surfer leaned in close, "But not here. Too many ears. Follow me."

Riptide marched over to a teleporter, holding a hand out for his friends to take. Dr. Zlo rolled his eyes, placing a hand on the surfer's shoulder while Sweet Dream grabbed his whole arm.

"Showoffs," Dr. Zlo muttered.

"You're just jealous, dude," Riptide teased.

Dr. Zlo waved away Riptide's comment as the teleporter activated. A villain of Dr. Zlo's caliber needed no one beside him! Besides, science could only ever be the man's one true love. That was how it went with the mad science types.

Riptide's destination brought Dr. Zlo to a patch of woods outside a sparkling city on a bay. Lights twinkled from skyscrapers across the Skyline, a second sky under the first.

"Sleepless City?" Dr. Zlo asked. "Why here?"

"Because it's one of the biggest cities in World of Supers," Sweet Dream answered. "And it's filled with NPCs just waiting to fall under our rule."

Dr. Zlo eyed Sweet Dream, "Rule?"

"Exactly, dude!" Riptide answered. "The other day I was thinking up some new ways to mess around in the game, and Dream here caught me monologuing."

"He was going on about some sort of demonic surfboard that took unsuspecting passengers for a ride," Sweet Dream interjected. "I told him that was a silly idea, and he should make surfboards that controlled people."

"So I got an idea!" Riptide said. "Instead of surfboards, what if it was candy! We sell it dirt cheap to anyone willing to buy and corner the market. Then, we start pushing out the rest of the candy competition and lace our goods with a substance so addicting, they'll have to come back!"

"And then you jack up the price, making the addicted masses follow your orders!" Dr. Zlo finished. "How diabolical! I'm surprised you thought of it."

"I thought of it," Sweet Dream answered. "Riptide only helped polish the plan."

"Whoever thought of it," Dr. Zlo said dismissively. "So, what do you need me for?"

"We want your help with the baking process," Riptide answered. "And don't worry, you'll get a cut of whatever we make."

Dr. Zlo took off his monocle and gave it a polish, pretending to think it over. "It's not my usual modus operandi, but the thought of a new army is tempting."

"Not just armies. You'd get a say in an entire candy operation," Sweet Dream added.

"Trying to sweeten the deal?" Dr. Zlo joked.

"You already made that pun," Sweet Dream pointed out. "Are you losing your touch?"

"Of course not," Dr. Zlo scoffed. "But when life gives you lemons, you take them and run."

"That is not how that saying goes," Sweet Dream said.

"It is when I'm around!" Dr. Zlo boomed. "Now, I assume you already have some ideas for this plan of yours?"

"Totally, dude!" Riptide said. "We found this awesome warehouse, perfect for a covert candy operation. It's got a secret underground and everything! You can build all the addicting stuff down below while the front makes actual candies."

"Getting a permit is easy enough," Sweet Dream continued. "I didn't even need a background check. I guess anyone can just make food. We might have to get around a few regulations, however."

"A simple matter, I suspect," Dr. Zlo answered.

"Possibly," Sweet Dream replied. "As long as they don't have a hero in the ranks."

"Sounds like you've got this all planned out," Dr. Zlo said.

"Yep! We just need you to make an addicting substance, and we're golden, dude!" Riptide said cheerily. "Dream, and I already found a bunch of baking equipment, and she can use her Licor-Icks as workers."

"And the hatbots will be our surveillance," Sweet Dream said.

Riptide's smile went from ear to ear, "Yeah, dude! This'll be as easy as taking candy from a baby!"

Sweet Dream groaned.

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves!" Dr. Zlo said. "I'd rather not fail in our endeavors because we thought the scheme would be easy."

"Right, right," Sweet Dream answered. "So, you're going to help?"

"Considered what you're offering, I see no reason not to," Dr. Zlo answered.

"H*ll yeah!" Riptide cheered. "The Three Amigos, at it again and causing mischief!"

"Quiet you," Sweet Dream said playfully. She turned to Dr. Zlo, "Come on, we'll show you where the factory is."

"By all means, lead the way," Dr. Zlo answered.