How To Survive as a Villain

They weren’t followed, and they didn’t take the Imperial carriage with them. They both walked slowly from the East to the West of the Palace, from the early morning to noon, until finally, Xiao YuAn stopped.

Yan HeQing raised his head and moved forward. There was smoke and fire, and the delicious smell of food was flowing all over the place. Outside this place, adorning the plaque, there were two words: Imperial Kitchen.

Yan HeQing was confused and asked: “This is the place?”

Xiao YuAn had a harmless smile on his face: “To tell you the truth, I’m lost.”

Yan HeQing: “……”

“Don’t look at me like that, I’m not familiar with the Palace. Yesterday I asked about the route, but in the end, the Palace is too big and the courtyard corridors are too similar. I lost my way while walking.” Xiao YuAn lifted his hands innocently.

Yan HeQing stared at him and started to feel a headache: “Then why did you stop walking?”

Xiao YuAn rubbed his stomach and let out a long sigh: “I’m hungry. I remembered that the Imperial Kitchen was near here, so I came over.”

Yan HeQing’s eyes flickered with helplessness: “Then go and take something to eat, wait, what are you doing?”

Xiao YuAn took a piece of silk cloth out of nowhere, covered half of his face, and tied a knot at the back of his head: “I’ll camouflage my identity, to avoid a ruckus, and then we’ll find someplace and fill our stomachs.”

Yan HeQing: “…”

If the Emperor goes and steals food from the Imperial Kitchen, won’t that stir up a ruckus?!

Xiao YuAn handed a piece of silk cloth to Yan HeQing. Immediately after, he moved quickly, hiding himself against the foot of the wall. Although Yan HeQing was hesitant with this plan, finally, he covered half his face and followed Xiao YuAn to the edge of the wall in the backyard.

At this moment, Xiao YuAn found himself in a complicated situation.

After all, in the 21st century, he was the President of a company and had no chance to practice any of this.

“I can’t climb up.” Xiao YuAn turned towards Yan HeQing for help.

Yan HeQing raised his head and looked at the edge of the wall. He backed away a few steps, then he ran at high speed and tapped the wall with his toes. He turned up with the help of his strength, moving the clouds and flowing the water¹.

Xiao YuAn sighed again and again inside his heart, he just can’t help but applaud with excitement.

He’s really worthy of being the male lead, he looks so handsome while jumping over a wall.

Yan HeQing grabbed the brim of the wall and wanted to pull Xiao YuAn over, but he saw that Xiao YuAn was walking forward silently, then he opened the small wooden door in the backyard and walked in leisurely.

Yan HeQing asked: “…Did you know the door was unlocked?”

Xiao YuAn replied: “Yes I knew. When I came by the wall, I saw that the wooden door was unlocked.”

Yan HeQing asked with complicated feelings: “Then why did you want to climb the wall?”

Xiao YuAn said with a gentle smile: “Because it gives kind of a sneaky feeling climbing over the wall, which is more in line with what we’re about to do.”

Yan HeQing could not bear it, he grabbed the back of Xiao YuAn’s neck and said with a cold voice: “I’ll see you on the road to the Yellow Springs².”

“Fight after eating your fill, fight after eating your fill!” Xiao YuAn wailed a few times, broke free from his tight grip, and then shrank back.

Yan HeQing glanced at him, and then turned around towards the kitchen.

It was noon, and the Imperial kitchen was extremely busy, there were people everywhere. The two of them made a quiet turn, and finally found a tranquil hut besides the firewood room.

This hut was surely used by the slaves to have their meals, it was simple, small, clean and desolate. At this time, the servants were very busy, so it was completely empty.

Xiao YuAn walked in and pulled out two white steamed buns from the pot, he held one for himself, and handed the other to Yan HeQing.

Yan HeQing took the steamed bun silently and chewed it up without hesitation.

“It doesn’t have meat…” Xiao YuAn mumbled and started to search through the cupboard.

Yan HeQing stood aside and watched how Xiao YuAn was making a mess by tossing and turning around things looking for something. His ears were listening sharply, suddenly, he heard some movement outside.

After Xiao YuAn searched through the cupboard, he searched in the furnace. Yan HeQing watched him become disheartened, and for a moment he was about to say something, but ended up staying silent.

“Ah, there’s roasted sweet potatoes.” Xiao YuAn, as if he had won the most valuable treasure, carried the sweet potato with ashes in his arms and turned his head to ask Yan HeQing for help. However, Yan HeQing’s eyes suddenly became alert and rushed over, he grabbed Xiao YuAn’s collar and threw him out of the window, quickly closing it after that.

Xiao YuAn rolled on the ground twice, falling into a daze he saw the sky turning upside down. He then heard a girl screaming: “Ah!! Someone help! There’s a thief!!”

Yan HeQing landed lightly on the ground. He stepped forward, picked up Xiao YuAn who was still rubbing his head, and flew away with his light tiptoes. The speed was astonishing fast, and after a while, they easily escaped.

After confirming that no one was following them, Yan HeQing put Xiao YuAn down.

Xiao YuAn quickly looked down and let out a long breath.

The sweet potatoes were still safe and secure in his arms, they were not lost.

Xiao YuAn rubbed his sore arm and handed Yan HeQing a piece of roasted sweet potato, patiently discussing with him: “Actually, I’m very fast when I have to escape through a window. Seriously, can you inform me beforehand the next time, when we see ourselves facing the same situation?”

Stealing food from the Imperial Kitchen, there will be a next time? Yan HeQing smirked and took the sweet potato without answering him.

After filling his stomach with sweet potatoes, Xiao YuAn looked around. There were no halls or dormitories around. The only thing he could see was gardens, no guards patrolling, it looked extremely lonely, unlike the inside of the Palace.

Xiao YuAn cleared his throat, turned his head to Yan HeQing and smiled, “I seem to be…”

“Ask for directions.” Yan HeQing interrupted him in a terrifying manner.

Xiao YuAn obediently turned around to find someone. This place was too wide, they walked around in circles until finally they met with an Imperial Guard.

The Imperial Guard also came here to take a nap. When he saw them, he panicked and immediately tried to avoid their escape. The two of them thought something was wrong, he waved his sword and ran towards them shouting: “Who are you! Where are you going?”

Xiao YuAn wiped his face, which was dirty with charcoal, revealing his features that could barely be seen before.

As soon as the Imperial Guard saw his face, he fell on his knees in complete shock: “Y-your Majesty?”

“Don’t kneel, get up.” Xiao YuAn raised his hand, unable to bear seeing him kneel.

The Imperial Guard stood up trembling all over: “Your Majesty, why are you here? This place is outside the Imperial City.”

Xiao YuAn said: “I want to ask you something, where’s the altar of the Temple of Heaven?”

The Imperial Guard replied: “Answering to His Majesty, it’s located in the South, for about six li³.”

Xiao YuAn thanked him with a smile, turned his head to see Yan HeQing and said: “Let’s go?”

“Yes.” Yan HeQing nodded.

The Imperial Guard stared at the two men leaving side by side, suddenly, he remembered something and ran towards them in a few steps: “Your Majesty, this place is outside the Imperial City and the road ahead is not easy to walk on, there’s many forests and paths. Would you like to go back to the Imperial City first and take the Imperial carriage?”

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it.” Xiao YuAn waved his hands, smiling warmly, the clear light of the daytime was illuminating his beautiful face and defined eyes and eyebrows. Suddenly, the guard couldn’t see the so called tyrant that everyone was talking about.

They ended up walking from noon to dusk.

Xiao YuAn wore a robe. Not only was he unable to open his legs, but also he always ended up hooking branches; he had to move slowly, one step after another. And if it weren’t for the cold, he really would’ve teared apart his hem.

In the evening, the sky gradually darkened, and the altar of the Temple of Heaven finally appeared in front of them.

Footnotes:

Footnotes

1. 行雲流水 xíng yún liú shuǐ; It’s a Chinese idiom, it’s used to describe things that are unstable and easy to disappear, fast and light. It’s also used to describe poetry, calligraphy, painting, and thinking naturally and smoothly. From 《答谢民师书》(dáxiè mín shī shū), “The Book Of Thanking Civilian Teachers”. Written by (苏轼 sū shì) Su Shi [1037-1101], a Northern writer and calligrapher of the Song Dynasty [960-1279], he’s also known as one of the Eight Giants of the Tang and Song Prose.
2. 黄泉 Huáng quán; In Chinese mythology, the Yellow Springs refers to the place where people go after death, the Underworld. The Yellow Springs is also one of the nine prisons of the Nine Springs (underworld). The Yellow Springs is related to burials: the excavations of the tombs in the Central Plains (the middle and lower regions of the Yellow River) occasionally encounters water mixed with loess (yellow sandy soil typical of North China), like in the Yellow Springs. So, it’s said that the Yellow Springs is the underground world where people live after death.
3. 里 lǐ; Ancient measure of length, approximately 500 meters. So six li are equivalent to 3 kilometers.